Poetry

Books

  • Where the Wild Ladies Are by Aoko Matsuda - almost certainly my favourite fiction book of all time. It's a collection of short stories, but the stories all take place in the same universe and increasingly share characters and overlap in interesting ways throughout the book. I want to live inside of this book. It broke my heart when I got to the end and there wasn't any more of it.
  • Someday This Pain Will Be Useful to You by Peter Cameron - this book was the most I've ever actually connected and related to a character. I highly recommend this for my fellow deeply isolated mentally ill freaks who constantly feel like they're so far removed from normal experiences that no media actually relates to them.
  • Chocolates for Breakfast by Pamela Moore - people will tell you that this is just the American knockoff of Bonjour Tristesse by Françoise Sagan but in my humble opinion Chocolates for Breakfast is better. I also get such a transmasc vibe from the main character I could probably write an essay about it.
  • Never Let Me Go by Kazuo Ishiguro - set in a world where clones are created solely to be used as organ farms, told from the perspective of one of the clones, reminiscing about her childhood and her relationship with her two best friends. It really nails building this weird, fucked up world in a way that feels familiar and believable, allowing the book to ultimately be about the relationships between the characters.

Film

  • After Hours (1985) - I could watch this movie five times in a row, probably. It's about this guy who goes out to read a book alone in a cafe because he wants to look intellectual and meets a lady who draws him in with the promise of engaging with NYC's local art scene by buying a plaster of paris bagel. He heads out to the artist's apartment to buy a sculpture as a paperweight, and this sets off a series of events in which everything goes wrong and no matter how hard he tries, he can't get home to his apartment. It's a lot crazier than that - he actually ends up getting hunted by a vigilante mob as well as encased in a statue before the night ends, among other things - but it's that universal nightmare of having a really shitty night and never being able to get home.
  • Titane (2021) - this movie is batshit and you need to watch it NOW. It's hard to say what it's about because there's so much going on and all of it is insane. The main character is a serial killer who's been impregnated by a car. She goes on the lam, disguises herself as this boy who was kidnapped years earlier, claims that she's him, finally escaped. She moves in with the kidnapped kid's dad, and since he's a fire chief he makes her a de facto fireman. This is all just the beginning of the movie. What are you still doing here? Go watch it!
  • Kimi (2022) - it's about an agoraphobe woman who works monitoring calls and who has to try and report a crime she suspects she heard over one of the calls. I don't know what the research was that the director Steven Soderbergh did into agoraphobia before directing this movie, but whatever it was, it was SPOT ON. In the scenes where the main character has to go outside, the movements of the camera somehow mimic nightmares I've had about just walking down the street.
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